Day 17 – Food

durian

I love to eat and because of my love for food, I thank God for blessing me with a high metabolism and thyroid disease!! As much as I eat, and what I eat– I should be huge! Because of my love for salt and sugar, I’d be screwed if I ever developed hypertension or diabetes. (aka “the sugar” where I’m from) There are some days I eat so much that I wonder if I have an intestinal worm.  If I do, I’ve had him my whole life because I’ve been the same petite size 4 since 5th grade. Stop your eye-rollin’ and bitchin’…   I’m not trying to rub it in that I can eat what I want and not gain weight. That is not what this is about.  This is about my love for food.

My favorite foods are those with thick gravies and heavy sauces. Love me some Indian curry.  I know Indians don’t eat beef due to how it could be their reincarnated uncle Jayarama but come on now, why must they substitute it with goat meat?  I do not like goat meat. Goat whether it’s meat or milk, no matter what spices you use with, taste like the smell of goat ass. No thank you, I’ll die first. I’m not quite sure what I think of lentils either. They’re kind of like peas and peas taste like.. peas. YUK!  Chicken.. Chicken is good.

Once we drove up to Louisville just to eat at an Ethiopian restaurant. My husband apparently fell in love with Ethiopian food while he was over there inoculating goats (haha goats. gross). Yeah- it’s pretty much not good.  Everything on the huge platter looked as though someone already chewed it up then hacked it back out; not a fan of squishy textures.   Their bread (injera) was something to enjoy!  Basically injera is an edible ACE bandage that taste like sour dough with more sour in it. Was fun to unroll it and gobble it up.   Ethiopian food was a disappointment for me because of the amount of beef used in the dishes. Being adventurous, I was hoping for grubs or something.

Mexican food is over-rated.  We have an “authentic Mexican restaurant” on every corner here; sometimes three!!  When I was in Mexico the food was the same as here in the States; Americanized.   Apparently I didn’t get far enough out of the tourist trap to sample real Mexican food.  It’s probably a good thing being that I spent waaaaay too much time at “Carlos & Charlies” dancing on the tables and in the tequila conga line.  Oh well, fortunately for me, I have some real Mexicans in my family and they make some good stuff.

Japanese, Korean, and Chinese food (in that order) is awesome and probably my favorite.  Where else on earth can one enjoy a frogs heart still beating on a stick,  or a side of fugu (deadly blowfish) or any other kind of sea creature you could imagine??  MMM.. kimchee and beef tongue.

Have I mentioned that Andrew Zimmern is my hero?  Man, I love him and I wish I had his job.  He travels about eating all kinds of weird stuff and after I watch him eat it on Bizarre Foods, I drive up to Cincinnati to an international market called, “Jungle Jims,” so I can buy what he ate and eat it too!  STALKER!!!!  hahahaha… So far I’ve eaten balut, durian and an assortment of insects.  Durian though- – wow. That thing should not be considered a fruit.  Fruit should be sweet, juicy and delicious.  Durian taste like garlicky feet, and armpit pudding. YUK YUK YUK!!!   I’ll post the video again just because it’s so funny.  My son is such a drama queen and I’m pretty ridiculous with cotton balls in my nose. hahaha  http://youtu.be/Zj4XBg_KJCk

Ok well, I have to go now; I’m starving!!

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