Day 38- Thoughts from a Nail Salon

As I sit and wait for my nails to be painted I look aroud and wonder how spoiled I am.  I mean, I pay $15- $20 every two weeks for someone else to paint a gel shellac on my nails instead of doing it myself.  I don’t get a manicure or a pedicure or acrylics, just paint that’s baked on so it lasts for a couple of weeks.  I have a thyroid disease – that means I have brittle hair and very flimsy nails. My nails, no matter what I do to them myself, peel like a wet paper towel. I’ve purchased all kinds of strengtheners and vitamins but the over-the-counter crap doesn’t work.  Only when I get gel baked on does it allow for nail growth and only when a woman has pretty nails does her hands look feminine.   Your hands are the second thing, (maybe the first) that other people look at when they meet you.  Maybe you work in customer service, maybe you’re at a bar or maybe your paying for your groceries… whatever you’re doing, your hands are being looked at and you’re being judged. There’s really not much more that’s as unattractive as chewed up or dirty nails… well besides nasty teeth but that’s a whole other post haha.  (Oh no worries, I’ll cover bad dental hygein eventually  because it’s a huge peeve of mine)  Ok so this place is called, Pro Nail. What does that mean exactly? Do I get only one professionally painted nail and the other 9 get done by the 4 year old Cambodian kid that hangs out here?    Even so, it’s probably better than I could do myself 😂
I’m telling you what though, this place stinks to high heaven.  They need to open a damn door or something; geeze. 

I wonder what the Cambodian ladies who work here are taking about? They sound angry when they converse. Are they yelling?  It sounds juicy and I want to know what they’re saying.

When did black and white stripe pants match pink and brown flowered shirts?  Oh… but those shoes are fab-a-luss. I want those shoes.

Picking a color is too hard. Why are there so many choices? Why isn’t there just like a red. A pink. An orange. A brown..? No that’s too easy so they have 35 shades of every base color to choose from. I think I’ll go with UK Blue.  Hell, why not?  Sports are really not my thing but at least I’ll look like I’m a member of the Wildcats club if I have blue nails and people will leave me alone. You see,  people don’t ask you questions about sports if they see you in UK blue & white.. they assume you’re one of them, but put on another color on game day and see what happens.  It’s like an Amish shunning. Smh. 

YES!!! Finally they opened the door. Thank God. I don’t know how much longer I could stand my brain slapping the backside of my eyeballs. 

*two minutes later*

Good feeling gone.  The lady who just bosses people around made me move from the second chair she put me in and moved me to a third.. away from the fresh air. (Sigh)

*takes two tylenol*

Ok I’m sitting here being a totally catty woman-  because her nails look like she’s gonna leave here and go train dragons or something.  She had acrylics put on but left them very long- painted them bright green with gold glitter at the tops, but one nail on each hand is red.  I don’t understand this. It’s ugly. Who pays for that??   Was that the plan from the start or did she just have a mental breakdown? 

I don’t think I could get my eyebrows ripped out in from of everyone.  The sign about waxing has a long lists of waxable parts. Bikini wax. Ok that’s fine but… where do you go to get your bush ripped out?  There’s no other rooms that I can see.. ‘cept a bathroom. 

Ain’t nobody got time for that.

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-Willow

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2 thoughts on “Day 38- Thoughts from a Nail Salon

  1. Oh, you crack me up! Gonna go get my bush ripped out in the bathroom, which I happen to know firsthand is a waste of money cause hair grows in cycles and there will be new growth in days. Sigh. Just shave that shit off and be done with it.

    Like

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